Do you often find yourself leaning up against a wall wondering who the heck am I? Are you worried about getting in the way or inconveniencing others? Do you sometimes secretly hope no one notices you and then feel hurt that they don’t?
This is an issue I have been dealing with my entire life, and I am really working hard to get to the bottom of it. I have spent most of my life trying be invisible, trying to stay out of the way, hoping no one notices. I have walked into many social settings or business networking meetings and completely felt less than adequate. After all, who am I? Why would anyone want what I am selling or need the services I have to offer especially when there are two hundred and two other places to get the same thing or something similar, or maybe something even better? In less than 30 seconds, I have successfully self-sabotaged myself and crushed my own dreams. All.by.myself. Luckily, I am fortunate enough to have people in my life who always believe in me, who cheer me on and who support me more than I support myself.
If you find yourself self-sabotaging and crushing your own dreams, now is the time to get serious about putting your big girl panties on and coming face to face with your insecurities because no matter how amazing your business plan is, lack of confidence and under-valuing yourself will become your worst enemy. If you aren’t sure about yourself or your products or services, how do you expect anyone else to be sure about you? I love this quote that my friend shared with me, “She woke up one day and threw all her excuses away.” It’s time to get off the couch, out of your pajamas and take yourself seriously. Because you DO have something to offer the world.
Of course, along with changing our minds about ourselves, there are practical action steps that will help us grow our confidence:
1] Commit to learning and improving. Do the research. Spend time listening to podcasts and online videos, and don’t forget to….
2] ….TAKE ACTION. Action builds confidence and fosters growth. Action is the wheels that take us where we want to go. Bite the bullet. Try it. You’ve got this.
3] Face your fears. Recognize them. Honor them. And then let them go. Realize that they are only inhibiting you from taking action. Once we acknowledge our fears, they most likely will not seem as scary as they once did. After all, what is the worst thing that can happen?
4] Don’t attach yourself to failure. If your attempt ends up being a complete failure, so what? Admit it. Learn from it. Grow. Improve. Try something different. Don’t keep beating a dead horse.
5] Surround yourself with people who are cheering for you, who believe in you. Surround yourself with people who are successful and lend good energy to the world.
6] Get out of your own way. Enough with the negative self talk and self-sabotaging.
7] Celebrate! Notice what you do right and celebrate that success. Focus on the positives, and always show the negatives the back door.
8] Don’t get sidetracked by your competition. Stay informed and be friendly.
9] Recognize that not every single person out there is a potential client, but that there are people who will benefit from your product or service.
10] Be sure to give back. There are opportunities all around us for giving back. Even if it is just a smile or a positive word. Let your light sparkle.